It’s a little bit funny this feeling inside
I’m not one of those who can easily hide
I don’t have much money but boy if I did
I’d buy a big house where we both could live

If I was a sculptor, but then again, no
Or a man who makes potions in a travelling show
I know it’s not much but it’s the best I can do
My gift is my song and this one’s for you

And you can tell everybody this is your song
It may be quite simple but now that it’s done
I hope you don’t mind
I hope you don’t mind that I put down in words
How wonderful life is while you’re in the world

I sat on the roof and kicked off the moss
Well a few of the verses well they’ve got me quite cross
But the sun’s been quite kind while I wrote this song
It’s for people like you that keep it turned onSo excuse me forgetting but these things I do
You see I’ve forgotten if they’re green or they’re blue
Anyway the thing is what I really mean
Yours are the sweetest eyes I’ve ever seen

And you can tell everybody this is your song
It may be quite simple but now that it’s done
I hope you don’t mind
I hope you don’t mind that I put down in words
How wonderful life is while you’re in the world

Just some of the many reasons why I am a fan of Annie Leibowitz….

I can not wait to look at my reflection in this beautifully awkward oversized bean again! :) Chicago… I will be there soon.

I watched the Guardian today at jury duty. And I have never quite looked at aging as delicately as this. I loved this quote, amongst many, and I loved the movie.

OKAY! So seriously- what is with all of this RAIN! It is bad enough that the past events in my life have been less than merry, and should constitute some rain because afterall, if my life was a movie, I feel rain would have been in many of the scenes in the past weeks. But enough is seriously enough!! I feel the need to build an arc- I mean if this was the end of the world and God was creating another flood- I would certainly be a sad version of Noah. A few reasons why:

1. Um I cant build?! - I am lucky to recognize a wrench, a hammer, and a screwdriver- anything else in the toolbox looks like a joke to me.

2. My family would be the only ones on the boat. I mean have you seen how LARGE my family is? I already cant build, so the 30 ft yacht I would like to picture sailing on is a far away dream, the reality would certainly be a decent size boat… so sorry to all the other people, Ill grab some life vests and inflatable mattresses… if I see you, Ill throw ya one.

3. Animals? Really? My boat would consist of dogs and cats… no elephants, lions, zebras… basically domesticated animals that would not be that interesting to watch on animal planet.

4. Last but not least- I remember something about a dove in this story. Well, thats a BIG problem. I HATE, LOATHE, DESPISE, GAG at the site or thought of birds. I dont like them. So sending a dove off with an olive branch or whatevs would definitely not happen.

Well, if were lucky, hopefully we will still have wireless, despite the flood. Alright, well Im off to read some Vogue- maybe get some inspiration for this boat of mine… we can at least look good sailing away. ;)

Yep. I would have to say that the title is the simplest and most delicate way to describe my abscence from this wonderland of writing. Life has been quite tumultuous lately. I believe my last post was about my roommate and friends graduating… May 9th to be exact! It was the same looooooooooooooooooong commencement as I experienced in December but much much longer. Luckily sitting with friends was a great distraction from the corny quotes, lengthy speeches, and horrible garb that sat among us. But nonetheless, it was a nice ceremony celebrating the accomplishments of my dear friends! Congrats biffs, Im so proud. Now for beginning of my fall into a dark abyss… yes, very emo of me, but trust me, I am not even exaggerating. Graduation night I received a call that my grandfather had fallen and was in the intensive trauma unit. Luckily my dad works at Delray Medical, so I was able to still get into the room to see him that night, even though it was incredibly late and way past visiting hours. Well that week is all of a blur to me now. My grandfather slowly was dying and was placed into hospice for the duration of the week until May 16th at 3:33am when he passed away. It feels so weird… you know, speaking of my grandpa in past tense. I have always prepared for THAT horrible day… and as morbid as that sounds, I am a very emotional and dramatic individual who has NEVER dealt with loss before. I thought that the day my grandpa, my hero and basically a second father to me, died, I would never NEVER be able to cope. I thought I would be balled up in a corner somewhere refusing food and drink, and losing contact with the rest of the world. Well, THAT day came and went. And instead of being in a state of depression, I am in a state of relief as well as numbness. I believe that my grandfather passed on in a way that every noble person should- with his family (ALL of his family) by his side, with a wake honoring him with masses of people filling the funeral home, with a burial involving soldiers saluting him, honoring him even in death, and giving my grandmother the American flag because of the dedication my grandfather had for this country. I am relieved. I am proud. And I am happy that he is in a place where he is not experiencing anymore pain and suffering, and that he is able to rekindle with all the rest of his family members that passed on before him. I have flowers overwhelming the interior of my home, sympathy cards, and mass cards, and the neverending phone ringing with calls expressing grief and disbelief. And despite the realness of it all, I still feel like I am watching it all happen, but not experiencing it- if that makes any sense what so ever. I think the main thing I am sad about is the fact that I lost one of the best men I knew. The fact that I no longer can dance with him to all of his infamous Sinatra songs. Every holiday, the chair at the head of the table will be filled with someone other than him- the man who started this family and kept everyone together. But most of all- I am saddened at the realization that I CAN live without him.

I guess all that is left to really say is that I love you grandpa, and I hope your making everything real cush for me up there in heaven… you know how high maintenance I am. I love you. I will try my best to live the life you lead- with honor and kindness and vigor. Numero Uno always.